Hello from the breakfast room of an aggressively bland mid-range hotel somewhere on the Eastern Seaboard. I passed on some suspiciously neon eggs in favor of a bowl of Corn Flakes and a limp cinnamon roll.

For obvious reasons, I’m not able to get specific about where the Ruiz campaign is spending the weekend. Members of the press who are traveling with Ruiz (and, I think, Grantham) have been asked not to post on socials for the next few days, because there’s evidence that suggests Wednesday’s attack was made possible in part by location metadata embedded in a couple of photos posted to Twitter. The other reporters — including, surprisingly, the guys from Red State Report and The Blaze — and I are currently in something of a standoff with Ruiz’s team, which has requested we allow them to “scan” our devices for a “security check.” I’m not exactly falling all over myself to hand over my electronics to the people who already force me to take a pregnancy test to cross state lines.

I was headed pretty much straight for the blasts when the bombs went off. Ruiz’s campaign motorcade is famously unsubtle — none of the classic, brooding authority of a snaking line of black SUVs. “Rudy’s Ryde” is a red, white, and blue custom job (remember his hearse?), and it was parked on a public street alongside a couple of “decoys” that I guess nobody thought would basically be a giant “place IEDs here” sign. The things are practically visible from space.

The explosion happened during breakfast, when Ruiz was hosting one of those classic average-folks-in-the-diner confabs. The guys from the Post and the Times still can’t get enough of the idea of Rudy the Revival President as “just a regular guy” story (but let’s be honest, they ate up this angle even before the president was resurrected). But I’ve heard Ruiz’s canned answers (“Not on Rudy Ruiz’s time, and not on Rudy Ruiz’s dime!”) dozens of times by now, so I headed outside hoping to find something more organic than the Ruiz campaign’s carefully curated selection of regular Joe-Schmoes.

Thanks everyone for checking in. Yes, I was still in New Hampshire along with Ruiz’s entourage and a few other reporters this morning. It was a scary few minutes, but the press pool have now been moved to a secure location and given our devices back.

At this point y’all probably have more details than I do; we have very limited internet access here and it’s practically impossible to load videos. We’re supposed to be getting a briefing from local authorities here in a couple minutes, so I’ll post more when I know more.

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The Associated Press finally called Iowa for Rudy Ruiz after a day of contentious political snarking between the Ruiz, Grantham, and Haley campaigns. It seems even death itself cannot stop the Rudy Ruiz train — the current/former president saw a record win in the Republican caucus.

I drove down to Austin last night to witness RevTech founder Carron Nielsberg being as manic and prickly as ever during a keynote interview at a SXSW Futures preview event. Texas Tribune journo Rosie Barnes handled the questions and, incredibly, managed to maintain a straight face through some truly bombastic stuff, including the assertion that America’s president-once-again, Rudy Ruiz, “is a god.” (The Ruiz Administration, which of course has deeper-than-deep ties to the American evangelical movement and might presumably take exception to this characterization, so far hasn’t commented.)

You can watch the full 90-minute conversation on YouTube (if you’ve got a strong stomach for unhinged rants and confrontation, really what else are Saturdays good for?), but my ears perked up when Barnes prompted Nielsberg for comment on my recent TIME cover story on RevTech, asking whether revival technology is “overblown.”

I promise I didn’t put Rosie up to it, but I was nevertheless fascinated by his response (transcript below). Listen in:

I was gearing up to post a response to the (many, ugh) critics of my TIME feature on RevTech (it’s been … a rough couple of weeks) when I got a text from a friend in the White House press pool.

It’s official: President Ashleigh Grantham, Jr. will be America’s second shortest-serving president, as he intends to “restore” the presidency to Rudy Ruiz “with all legal haste and urgency.” Grantham will of course retain the honor of being America’s oldest-ever commander-in-chief. He turns 95 on January 10.

The Hill had the scoop a few minutes before 11am ET today, publishing a piece just as the Grantham Administration announced it would be issuing a “special message” live from the Oval Office at 3pm ET. It’s all but certain that the contents of that “special message” will be that Grantham’s DOJ intends to drop the administration’s challenge to Rudy Ruiz’s 25th Amendment claim to the presidency. Grantham is expected to move back into his former position as veep.

Ruiz posted a very short, text-only update on PatriotWire shortly after The Hill piece ran, saying he’ll be issuing a public statement “from my heart, in America’s heartland,” this evening.